Ladies and Gentleman the mayor of New York

Good morning

It's been brought to my attention that many rap artists

Claim that they run New York

But this is not the case

In fact I wrote my own song about what it's really like

Please excuse the profanity in advance

Hit it

I run New York

New York big city of dreams

And you know that I run this town

King of the streets dressed in concrete

Skyscrapers on my crown

So if you want this Big Apple

Come try to take a bite

Cause I run this motherf**king city

And I won't give it up without a fight

Yo I run New York

It's a pain in the a**

The city's crowded as f**k

And it's covered in trash

And the sanitation chief just shoveled sh*t in my face

Another transit strike aw f**king great

I can't wait to have another meeting with the labor union

So that Mark can bend me over and then shove their f**king shoe in

But I do it so you can sip your pumpkin lattes

I literally run New York and it's exhausting

I run New York

It's a f**king headache

It really wears you down

In this lake of bureaucratic bullshit

It's a miracle I don't drown

I don't literally run New York

I run the marathon

Plus I organize it

So I double run the marathon

But no one seems to give a f**k that I'm a paragon

Instead they photoshop me so it's looking like I wear a thong

So they laugh at it in my own office when I'm gone

Went to the Nick's game and they booed me on the Jumbo Tron

Excuse me for trying to help you

They won't be satisfied till I'm locked up in Belleview

I guess they don't tell you this job sucks dick

I run New York and it feels like sh*t

The chief of Police is a major bully

He laughs at my ideas

He made fun of my tie last week

And I had to fight back tears

Now on the surface it probably looks like I should quit

Cause I spend every day getting punched in the dick

But at night I travel down into the subway

Wearing chain mail locked and loaded for gun play

And battle the gigantic fire breathing mutant rats

If I f**king quit who the f**k would do that

I'll give you a hint the answer is no one

That's why I'm in the sewer dressed up like a show gun

Cause I'm the equinox

I helped James Springs

Releasing hounds reef in the blood of kings

And no one even knows they just think I'm a dork

But I still kill those f**king dogs cause I run New York

I run New York

It's a shitty gig

No overtime in my pay

I asked the city for a f**king bonus

And they said no f**king way

So rotten is this big apple

It's crawling with worms inside

But I run this motherf**king sh*t hole city and it makes me want to die

I run New York

Thank you